Happy B day .......doc

one of the doctors that I work for is celebrating a birthday today. I don't know how old he is, it's kind of hard to tell. So to celebrate the day in my own way......as we are too cheap in this office to actually go out and celebrate like grown ups with a lunch or after work drinks......i've decided to give him something every short, smart-ass, pediatric surgeon dreams off..........

A wild unbridled time with young chicks.......

just remember doc.......what happens in the office............stays in the office.

Say a little prayer

My daughter just e-mailed me that Morgan Freeman the actor was in a car wreck in Mississippi yesterday and is in the MED........say a little prayer that he will pull through okay.

Here's a little six degrees of separation for you......same said daughter worked for an optometry joint here in Memphis for awhile a few years ago, a real Eclectic shop(wink wink) and delivered Morgan's glasses to him but only after her and the optometrist both tried them on and took funny pictures of themselves. She saw him again in the parking lot of the same office and tried to get him to autograph a traffic ticket she had in her glove compartment. He politely told her that he "doesn't do that". I teased her that perhaps it was the traffic ticket that he didn't do and she should have bared an arm or thigh for his john hancock. She quipped back....."He's to classy to whip out John Hancock on the street."..............geez, where does she get it from.

BAD BOYS.....BAD BOYS.......AND GIRLS.....

Seems with the hot weather comes an increase in all sorts of crime.

Last week or so I posted about Cool hand Luke. My favorite incarcerated character. But in real life some of those found guilty of crime ain't having such a cool time of things.

In fact on the news yesterday, former senator Kathryn Bowers has written a letter to a news anchorwoman in Memphis telling her about the sad and sorry conditions that she and other inmates are having to endure. She suspects its from the drinking water as she has had an intestinal situation going on since she arrived there a while back. See there is a waste treatment facility very close to the prison. Ms. Bowers also had pre existent medical issues and these have worsened. Gosh, hope she will be okay. You know being elderly and all. Wouldn't it be nice if she was visited by some of her former constituents. Just like old Luke in the movie, gets a visit from his sick and dying mother(Arletta); Kathryn she is visited by some kind hearted person who hasn't been able to afford decent medical care, forced to live in substandard housing, endure toxic conditions very close to their own front door, and has been unable to have their own needs met.

Then there is John Ford, no not the movie director, but an ex-senator here in Tennessee. He's already serving 5 1/2 years and has possible 20 more coming...lets see ole Johnny is 66 now so he ought to be about done when he gets out. If grace had not stepped in back in the spring of 85 , then I would be requesting a move to a prison closer to his. Yes, ole John and me we had us a "failure to communicate" on Union avenue and I've been wanting to have just 5 minutes of his time ever since. (sorry, no picture of him.....you'd never get the ugly image erased from memory)

along these lines......My sister called me at work this morning and told me about a man in Virginia, who was giving his last testament, before his death sentence was carried out. He requested that the state tell his family that he loved them; that the governor of Va. understand that he had lost this man's vote; and could they hurry it up cause he was dying to get out of there.

well, its Friday and it's hot here in Memphis........and like Luke Jackson, i'm planning on busting out of this joint today........gonna call life's bluff and see what happens....what's the plan......nothing. Like Luke said. "Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand."

end of the week ........

It's Friday afternoon at 3:25 p.m.

and my work today has wiped me

out!!!!!!!!

and when I get off today........I want one of these as bad as

tomorrow i plan a trip to the farmer's market to bring home

but only after doing

a little

will even a take a few of these

if I can get them

I won't be here at work

and that will make me

Hope you enjoy your weekend...................jinks.

YOU KNOW , YOU KNEW, YOU HAVE KNOWN...

you know all those e-mail surveys that want to know what your favorite this and your best that....they usually start out with......1> What is your full name.......shortly followed by how many times you skipped school, what countries have you visited......so on and so forth. They are meant to help you learn more about the people you already propose to know.

I decided to make up one myself and post it.....but I don't want to know your answers......

It's not that i'm not intersted in knowing who you are....its that I want to ask questions that you

might not feel comfortable answering......afterall, what good is a question if someone is willing to share the answer? (are you beginning to see how my mind plays?)

1. Who do they think you are?

2. Is there a person you love as much as you hate?

3. Do you ever despised the person you have become?

4. Would you really do "anything" for the people you say you would?

5. How often do you agree to "pray for" whatever and never have any intention of doing so?

6. What is it you can't stop yourself from ?

7. Is there something you would do if you knew you could get away with it?

8. Do you just love to say "I hate to say I told you so, but......."?

9. What is the longest length of time you've ever lied to yourself?

10. If you could just walk away from your life , would you?

Okay, my mind is tired of screwing around......type to you laterz.

PLAIN NUTS.....OR MR. PEANUT, IS THAT YOU?

Yesterday, i heard two unbelieveable news casts.....one on CNN....and the other was related to me by my baby sister, Lou. Both had to do with nuts.

Let me get the more notable story out of the way. Jessie Jackson's squirrely comment regarding Barry Obama's testicles. Makes perfect sense to me....meaning that I can well see where the Irreverent Jackson is coming from, seems we always want what we don't have.

If Jessie gets his way then Barry would be the father of the new ..NAACP?

National African American Castrated Politicians.

Well, I dare say Mr. Obama wouldn't be AWOL or MIA he would take responsibility in his leadership role.

Second story, reported to me by my sister, was a local news cast she viewed about a pervert who is walking into backyards and apartment complexes in Eastern Shelby County, Tn. naked and exposing himself.

Seems the news anchor interviews an elderly woman who was a victim. The woman describes her shock and awe at hearing someone beating the heck out of her back door and when she arrived this man was naked as a jay-bird standing there aggressively mastubating. She felt threatened and sexually violated. A news anchor person reports then that most of these jerks are harmless and do this for shock value. The elderly lady assures him that he was a very aggressive man and that she and others in her neighborhood would look to the police to lend a "steady hand" in halting this guys activities.....the news caster with a straight face and no emotion in her voice says something to the effect..."I had a chance to speak with Memphis Police and they assured me they would try to catch this man. I asked them what the public should do to protect themselves in the meantime.......their suggestion was ......motion detectors. "

In cashew were offended by anything I might have said here today......let me apologize

besides everybody knows that sometimes you feel like a nut....sometimes you don't.

"It must be the heat, Cap'n"

Went blog "gigging" today and caught a whole mess of em. Thoughts that is.
Folks are either too uncomfortable or too tired from the weather or life in general.
Some were asking great questions, like Merelyme. Others giving great answers.

In these dog days of summer, when it's just too hot to do anything else, I enjoy watching classic movies. One that came to mind today is "Cool Hand Luke". You know the one with Paul Newman,George Kennedy,Strother Martin, and several other(Oh, that's what's his name) guys even a young Dennis Hopper. It's about prison life, pre-bleeding heart liberal glamour slammer days. Lots of sweating bodies, sun up to sun down labor, pent up frustrations....like your day job only (hopefully) without a state owned and operated rifle in your face.

Dealing with oppressive heat makes me think of the ultimate chain gang punishment.....no not a walk down Lamar Avenue at high noon...(but close)...it's the dreaded "box"....small shed structure, dirt floor, no lights, no windows, no real ventilation, just you and a slop jar.

In the movie, Ralph Waite (aka, John Walton-The Waltons) turns into a sniveling hot mess, while he is forced into this hellish "time out". I was so embarrassed for him.

Here is a lengthy piece from this movie given by "Carr"the floor walker to the new prisoners upon their arrival in the cell house.....If any of this sounds familiar to you, perhaps your parents used it as a prototype to lay down the ground rules to you as a youngster. Used it myself with my own little convicts. Well here 'tis and I'll type to you tomorrow. Stay cool ya'll.....real....cool.


Them clothes got laundry numbers on them. You remember your number and always wear the ones that has your number. Any man forgets his number spends a night in the box. These here spoons you keep with you. Any man loses his spoon spends a night in the box. There's no playing grab-ass or fighting in the building. You got a grudge against another man, you fight him Saturday afternoon. Any man playing grab-ass or fighting in the building spends a night in the box. First bell's at five minutes of eight when you will get in your bunk. Last bell is at eight. Any man not in his bunk at eight spends the night in the box. There is no smoking in the prone position in bed. To smoke you must have both legs over the side of your bunk. Any man caught smoking in the prone position in bed... spends a night in the box. You get two sheets. Every Saturday, you put the clean sheet on the top... the top sheet on the bottom... and the bottom sheet you turn in to the laundry boy. Any man turns in the wrong sheet spends a night in the box. No one'll sit in the bunks with dirty pants on. Any man with dirty pants on sitting on the bunks spends a night in the box. Any man don't bring back his empty pop bottle spends a night in the box. Any man loud talking spends a night in the box. You got questions, you come to me. I'm Carr, the floor walker. I'm responsible for order in here. Any man don't keep order spends a night in...




P.S. Tried to put up an image of Paul Newman and blogspot came back with their version of
"What we have here....is a failure to communicate."......i'll try again when the sun goes down.

HAPPY B-DAY EARL

My brother Earl has a birthday today.I hope he is celebrating it in good health and with good friends. Earl is a christian, brother, husband, father, grandfather, hardware salesman,entrepreneur, good story teller, even better joke teller, and probably has a hundred other titles he humbly goes by. His comic attitude was the bases of so many of our family's good memories. I look forward to the day that I can hear one of his great grandchildren laughing over his tried and true antics.

As is the case with most truly likeable folks they collect an assortment of nicknames, Earl your no exception to this rule. So here is to Early Bird, Earl the Pearl,and Uncle Bossman....

WHERE PARADISE LAY......

When I was a child my family would travel back to western Kentucky where my parents were born."

I hear this song and I'm transported back to 1970 and my family is on vacation in western Kentucky outside of Bowling Green at Beech Bend park, which the Green River runs past


"And there's a backwards old town that's often remembered so many times that my memories are worn."


Its a mid-summer afternoon and my older brother Earl and I have rented bikes from the park and we are biking down a shady dirt path through the countryside along the rivers edge. We are free as birds. It is one of those perfect times in your life, when you are running on all cylinders, enjoying all your senses, feeling alive and joyous and knowing that if it all ended at that very moment you would leave this world having known what it was to be truly happy.


"When I die let my ashes float down the Green River
Let my soul roll on up to the Rochester dam
I'll be halfway to Heaven with Paradise waitin'
Just five miles away from wherever I am." song by John Prine.


Thank you Earl.

BOB'S NOT MY UNCLE

but Dick Tindall was....loved that guy. He was dark, handsome, loved to laugh, told great jokes, smoked Salem cigarettes for years, was in WWII, saw Patton once, met and married my Aunt Dorthea on a short stop through Fort Dix, brought her back down south, had four sons in whom he believed. As a young man he worked hard, drank hard, played hard and loved hard. He had a massive stroke in his early 30's , which left him partially paralyzed on one side and doctor's told him that he would never walk again. He was tougher and more determined than anyone could have imagined. He did walk, he raised a family and he out lived his parents and other four siblings. He passed away just within hours of his oldest son. They had a double funeral. If you've seen his youngest son Radford, who is an Elvis artist on Beale Street in Memphis, well then you've seen my uncle. Radford is the spitting image of his 'Pop and sang two of his favorite songs, My Way and Dixie at his funeral. Uncle Dick saw promise and ability in everyone and he was always proud to know you. Family meant everything to him. If you were kin then you were his heart. He loved to talk of the good times, and enjoyed telling us as kids about our family's history. He shared a memory once that has stuck with me and will become part of a story line. I miss you Uncle and I know wherever you are there's great laughter and much love.

RUNNING ALONG JUST FINE.

Last night Bill and I went to Rhodes College and met up with about 50 other members of the MRTC (Memphis Runners and Track Club)for the Budmile. Its just a nice get together to race between other members, make a few friends, and get a few tips from the others. Bill ran in the first heat coming in at about middle of the pack at 7:37 for a mile run. The last runner in that heat came in at 10:32 and since I knew I was much slower in my mile (14:30)I chose not to run. These guys might be quick on their feet but some of them would have forgotten what they were doing there by the time I finished. So I sat in the bleachers and did what I do best....encourage the bravehearts. Ya'll I clapped and hollered like a mad fan. The last heat was with runners making the mile in less than 5 minutes. Is true, everyone loves a winner so it was like a day at the horse races for these folks and some of them ran like thoroughbreds with nostrils flaring, jockeying for position on the inside track with glistening muscles. When it was all over there was time to talk to a few seasoned atheletes who assured me that before they ran all the umpteen marathons they too were a slow-go. One fellow, who runs the Boston marathon recalled that 10 years ago it was the fact that he couldn't run a half mile that got him seriously running. I guess nothing gives you motivation like humiliation.

I'm really proud of Bill, after all he's in his late 50's and has a walking route as a letter carrier and he still puts forth tremendous effort. He gets frustrated at times, when guys older than himself breeze past him but he uses it to keep himself going.

Did a lot of "self talk" as I sat on the bleachers waiting for the event to begin. Sure I wasn't in the same league as these folks when it came to times. If they had had a slower heat, I would have entered...maybe. But I would be damned if i'd give up. I had worked hard and it took a lot for me to get to where I am now. If I had gone to one of these runs a year ago I can only imagine how insecure I would have felt. I would have surely given in to the notion that an overweight woman in her 50's could only look foolish trying to learn to run. Funny thing today, when I think back about yesterday, it's the faces of the slower runners that I remember. I can't lose sight of the fact that everyone is in a race by themselves and with themselves. I will remember it is none of my business what other people think about my ability...it only matters what I think. If I think I can...then I can. Next year at the same race...no better yet, at the Mug mile, which runs two weeks sooner, this old mare is going to pony up to the red line and strut her stuff and if I'm dead last so what. It's crossing the finish line like everyone else that matters.

YOU DECIDE......

"WHEN SOME-THONG IS WRONG WITH MY BABY"

OR

"TANGLED UP IN BLUE"

What the hell is it?

"What the hell is it?".....remember that great skit from Saturday Night Live?

Steve Martin and Bill Murray started it and it went on for weeks with other guests.....

well that is what I thought of when I came upon my search engine Yahoo page this a.m.

Scientist are puzzled over some white material on some pics of Mars. Is it ice or salt?

I"ll put up the pic ..... you and I will decide what we think it is... okay?

Ooh, Ooh, before we split for cranial outer limits ........let me tell you all how much I enjoyed "blog jumping" this morning. Thank you BBC, for turning me on to so many interesting folks out there......okay now everyone strap on your aluminum hat shields so "They" can't read our thoughts....lol.

WHAT THE HELL IS IT?

1. Chicken feathers.

2. (your turn......

"What on earth is wrong with you?"

Well, there you have it......."Everything" including your eyes because they can't make out the small print below the main title. Let me help you with that, because I can't help but be nauseatingly helpful, sometimes I hate myself for that. It reads....." The modern woman's guide to finding self confidence through self loathing"

"It is a wonderfully relaxing summer read. My confidence soared while lounging kiddie-pool side staring over my enormous gut and wondering why I ever worried about looking like 15 pounds of crap in a 5 pound bag. ".......Mona Downtrodden, (twice screwed over for the position of) assistant to the co-editor of the classified section...Birmingham Bad Times.